Happiness Is....

I do not play the Lottery.  I'm just not that lucky.  I am too much of a pessimist.  I don't believe that you should buy a Lottery ticket on a day when good things happen...what are the chances of getting a new job, having a new baby, buying a new house AND winning the Lottery?  If I were to play, I'd probably do it on a day that has nowhere to go but up.  Which probably means I should play the Lottery a lot more often than I do, but with my luck, I'd have a winning lottery ticket in my junk drawer for years, then would throw it out in a fit of cleaning.

There are many things that make you FEEL like you've won the lottery, though, even if it's only for a moment.  If you choose to focus on them, they can turn your whole day around.  Unfortunately, they happen about as often as actually winning the Lottery.  Here are a few of my favorites:

Waking up in the middle of the night, and realizing that you don't have to get up for a few more hours.

The quiet in the house when the entire family is in bed for the night, and I'm still raring to go.

Leaving my husband to deal with some Life or Death fight (like, over what to have for breakfast), because I have to walk the dog.

Going to the bathroom and NOT hearing something that sounds remarkably like the Texas Chainsaw Massacre going on outside the door.

Both kids falling asleep in the car when all the errands I have to accomplish have Drive-Thru service.  And I remembered to bring my Nook.

When both kids make the transfer from the car to bed, and still stay asleep.  And nobody's even sick.

Kids that go to bed willingly, because they are tired.

The day you realize your kid hasn't had a potty accident in over a week.

After rushing around, thinking you are late, it turns out you are actually early, for once.

The day everyone gets out of the house without a struggle (usually only the first day of school but take it where you can get it).

A coupon for a free coffee.  It could be a small, and it could be 100 degrees outside.  I will still drive 15 minutes out of my way if there's free coffee involved.

After months of debating over an issue, the moment that your husband admits that you were right.

A new download from iTunes.  Nothing can make disinfecting the kitchen go faster.

You have to take pleasure in the small things in this job, because the big ones are as rare as hen's teeth. But the more you focus on gratitude, the smoother the day goes.  What are some of the things that make you dance for joy?

The Monster Under The Bed

New parents are totally nervous about ruining their children from day one.  I always tell them that they get one year free from the eventual Therapy Bill that will eventually occur, and that it takes years to make really good prison fodder, so they are probably doing ok.  Not that I have anything to back this up, or anything....While I'm sure Jeffery Dahmer's mom loved him too, I try to keep a little perspective when it comes to raising my kids.

With this in mind, there are a few lies I've told my kids over the years that eventually are going to bite me in the @$$ someday, but in the meantime, they are too cute not to share.

Puppy Love

I live in a beautiful neighborhood, that used to be a senior community.  Which means that there are very few children here, and yet the seniors are generally pretty grouchy.  You may think I'm being unnecessarily harsh, but I am honestly calling a spade a spade here.  Old people yelling at kids for climbing trees or having lemonade stands just feels un-American. That's the kind of neighborhood I live in.  They love their flowers and their trees, and you'd best not mess with it, dammit.

But now I have a dog.

And he's the cutest thing ever.

It's the Swagger That Suffers

Today, I had errands to run, so my younger two ducked out as soon as the kids were on the bus to go to school, and ran out.

For some reason, BeeBeeBye was giving me grief...not wanting to leave, wanting to make sure he had the "right" cars to bring with him, not wanting to put shoes on....it was making leaving the house soooo much fun.
By the time I got near the grocery store, I was stressed out.  As I was making a left turn into the plaza, I realized that someone was trying to cross the street, but was crossing in the middle of the intersection.  So I had to block traffic while he strolled down the street.  Then, once I parked, my car nearly got swiped by the person parking next to me. I was beginning to wonder who let the crazies out.

Not daunted, I unleashed my kids and entered the store, only to have a 10 minute dispute over which kind of "kid-friendly" cart they wanted to ride in (not that they actually ride in it, mind you.).  We hauled out of that area, only to realize that a trip to the bathroom was necessary.  I attempted to keep my youngest from playing in the toilets, changed him, and got back to our cart.  He climbed into the "car" and I knelt down to buckle him in...

...and heard a ripping sound.

...and felt a cool breeze.

and left the store with my @$$ hanging out.  Thank goodness I don't wear thongs.

I took that as a sign from above that I should NOT go to the grocery store today.  Wouldn't you?

Fluff, Fold, Repeat

A friend of mine posted on Facebook that, if she went missing for any length of time, we should look for her under the huge pile of laundry that has taken over her basement, buried to death.

She only has one kid.

I was just glad that I am not the only one who feels that way about it...because I feel that way every week.